Day 51 December 20th, 2023 So again, I am just watching the movie for the sake of watching it. As much as I want to review more deleted scenes or sequences today, I am not feeling it. I am starting to wonder if this will take a toll on me mentally. It is like a daily chore like brushing your teeth or showering just to watch it. I know that I have a lot going on outside of watching the film, and seasonal depression is probably kicking in if you couldn't tell from some of the anti-Christmas stuff I was saying yesterday. For the record, I once liked Christmas, then I saw how dysfunctional my family became after my father passed away, and we were able to only get a handful of good Christmas Eve nights. It started going downhill after I had my colon resection. I do blame myself for the start of the decline. I ripped my brother's family a new hole because I took all my pain out on them. This was when I grew less fond of letting the kids do whatever they wanted. I did not yell at the
Day 100 February 7th, 2024 Is it over? I will be the first to admit that the first 100 days were tough. It all seems easy on paper but in practice this sucks. I feel like I could have applied myself to something better and something that could improve my overall mental state along with my health. Instead, I do the opposite and strangely I am somewhat okay with that. Theories... Theories... Theories. I have written quite a few theories about this movie and to be honest that is what is making the project fun. The movie is pretty much cut and dry but for me to survive I have to look into the film and find some deeper meaning towards certain aspects. Do I honestly feel that some of the crackpot theories I’ve written hold some weight, yes. It is my opinion of things and how I see them and in ways envisioned them and interpreted them. I feel that being able to express them in a medium that I prefer it is allowing me to enjoy what I am doing. Someday I’d like to adventure into a podcast about
Day338 October 2, 2024 I loved the Pee Wee Herman reference in the film with the line, "I know you are but what am I?" It was a humorous and nostalgic moment that added a touch of lightheartedness to the scene.
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