Movie Concept

This post is a departure from the regular posts. This is a concept for a movie I would like to look into filming at some point next year. In no way is it meant to be taken seriously or have concern for my well-being. I am doing fine, just dealing with a cold today. I have been writing this on and off for six months; today, I decided to see what AI could bring to the table and see if it would keep my vision. To me, it did not disappoint. I do have my original notes of ideas.

Here we go.

Movie Theater Funhouse: A Christmas Adventure

The staff members at a secluded movie theater have endured mistreatment from guests for numerous years, particularly during the holiday season. Last Christmas became the catalyst that set everything into motion for the events leading up to Christmas 2024. Over a year, the staff worked tirelessly, constructing traps, tampering with food, and setting up various deterrents for the guests.

Adherence to rules ensures a delightful experience. However, veering from these guidelines initiates a more intriguing journey. The theater transforms into a maze of heat and ice traps. Food becomes tainted with Purell sanitizer, rumored to have a sweet taste. Amidst this unusual Christmas adventure lies the appearance of spiders, snakes, scorpions, and deadly ants—an unconventional yet sinful addition to the festivities.

Should you not have received commendations from our staff, brace yourself to hear them a thousand times more until your ears are bleeding. Regrettably, a few of our employees have sensitive tendencies; one misstep might trigger their irritation.

These are basic rules for the theater etiquette outlined as follows:

Respect: Treat all staff and guests with respect and courtesy.

Adherence to Policies: Follow the theater's guidelines regarding behavior, movie schedules, and seating arrangements.

No Disturbances: Avoid disruptions during movie screenings, such as talking loudly, using cell phones, or causing distractions.

Cleanliness: Maintain cleanliness in common areas and dispose of trash in designated bins.

Food and Beverage Etiquette: Consume food and beverages only in designated areas and avoid spillage.

Safety Measures: Adhere to safety protocols, including following emergency procedures if required.

Compliance: Obey instructions from theater staff and security personnel promptly.

Responsible Enjoyment: Enjoy the movie-going experience responsibly without causing discomfort or disturbance to others.

Here are the official rules for the theater in this adventure:

Form a single-file line in an orderly manner. Engaging positively with the staff by bobbing your head or having friendly interactions will ensure an exceptional theatrical experience.

Refrain from staring at the employees, as it may result in an extraordinary, albeit explosive, reaction.

Be aware that the staff operates at their own pace and might not be concerned with customer business on that specific day.

Ordering just one item may be one item too many.

Know the butter concept for popcorn. Buttered is never in layers; that is impossible to achieve. If you ask for your butter in layers, you are doomed! The proper ordering method is butter throughout.

Complaining on Google achieves absolutely nothing; it falls on deaf ears or blinds Al, who was used to editing this.

Be prepared to receive a diaper with your extra buttered popcorn. In your misadventure, you will be bleeding out of all orifices with an extra buttered popcorn; rumor has it you will be liquified.

Avoid going out to the compactor, or you will come into contact with Dave, our resident executioner.

Lastly, the customer is never right in this actual miscarriage of justice. Despite assertions of understanding the rules, many do not. Some suffering is legendary, even in hell, if you talk or use your phone during the movie or disobey the rules.

Never ask for a refill.

Don't be late because you will never regret being late again.

Movie jumping will result in the loss of limbs.

IDs are required for every show so that it is easier to identify the bodies later in the event of mass chaos unfolding.

Silence is cherished, Respect is valued, Disrespect is not tolerated—it's met with severe consequences!

Please note: The staff doesn't manage lost items; the responsibility lies with you, not us.

Get ready for some festive mischief this Christmas—'tis the season for a playful yet daring spirit!

Additionally, please refrain from requesting any 'special love' that involves altering your popcorn container.

We assure you that the cat is doing just fine and is happily living its life.

Furthermore, kindly avoid forming lines where someone has their back turned to you. This peculiar habit seems unique to America, where impatience often overshadows the understanding that the customer isn't always right.

Lastly, remember that hurling insults won't go unnoticed; our staff can return them just as well.

It will be a December to Dismember is this Chin Up, Tits Out extravaganza.